The only way to make a martini is to fill a shaker with vodka or gin and ice, stand across the room, and think “vermouth” in the general direction of said shaker, then shake vigorously. Add olives, onions, or a twist. Any caloric expenditure is offset by being able to look like an awesome bartender type shaking your shakers without much effort actually having gone into it.
“
| — | RogerTheShrubberer, on martinis. |
